Be a Court Side Advocate for Christ

This past volleyball season, I learned that the moments God calls us to lean deeply into His embrace are the same moments that the devil does everything in his power to prevent us from doing so. My position on my team this year did not allow for me to see much court time, but I am truly thankful because it provided the opportunity for me to intentionally search the depths of my heart and better understand who I am because of Jesus Christ.

The word “useless” stung my heart and left a knot in my throat almost every game I watched my best friends play as I stood on the sidelines. I wanted to be out there with them. I wanted to help them reach our team goals. I wanted to feel the rush of adrenaline they felt every time we scored a point. But there I stood, with cold muscles in a dry jersey, questioning my worth as an athlete and teammate. I felt incapable, like I wasn’t good enough, like my team couldn’t trust me, like I let my team down by not training hard enough, I felt useless.

I became so focused on the battle with the opponent in my mind, that I could hardly cheer for my teammates who fought the opponents across the net. Externally, I shouted words of encouragement to my teammates, but, internally, my heart was crippling with a feeling of worthlessness. It was almost as if every cheer I shouted for the team was an attempt to keep my head above the waves of my own self-doubt.

But then I realized that it wasn’t simply me against myself in my head. Instead, there was, and still is, a very real enemy taking advantage of my weaknesses and using them to trample my identity, as well as my love for volleyball. When I understood this, I thought of James 4:7, “Therefore, submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.” Rather than rely on my own weak self to fight off the lies in my head, I took God’s word for it, and started asking Him to take away the anxious and degrading thoughts swirling around in my head. Standing courtside, I asked the Holy Spirit to help me—to be present with me—and then I literally told the devil to get out of my head. Immediately, I started to feel the weight of self-doubt lift off my shoulders.

From that day on, before every game, I asked God the same thing; that He would help me and be present with me, as I anticipated the lies that were about to fill my head. Even though the desire in my heart as an athlete was to get out there and play alongside my best friends, I couldn’t help but start to think that God needed me right there on the bench to support and encourage my sisters in Christ, as well as to lean deeper into the comforting character of the Holy Spirit.

When Satan told me, “You are useless,” God told me, “I am using you”.

When Satan told me, “You aren’t good enough to be out there,” God told me, “I need you right here”.

When Satan told me, “You aren’t noticed,” God told me, “They will notice Christ in you”.

Instead of seeing it as “bench player”, what if we saw it as “Christ advocator”?

When we look at being a “bench player” through the lens of our personal desires, then we become susceptible to the devils lie that we aren’t good enough. On the other hand, if we look at sitting the bench as an opportunity to advocate for Christ, then we can fully plug into the power of the Holy Spirit and become lights to our teammates, coaches and spectators.

Hannah Berger

My name is Hannah Berger and I am a senior on the Messiah College Women’s volleyball team. I am passionate about building relationships with people, writing in my prayer journal, photography, and spending time with my family! I have three sisters, two nephews, and one beautiful, brand-new baby niece. Oh, and I’m 6”3 tall!